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Responsibility and metamours

What emotional responsibilities do you have in a relationship and where do the end? How do you navigate relationships with metamours? These are for and about negotiation.

Episode 1: Thruple Trouble

The first episode of Non-Monogamy Help is now out! Have a listen below. https://anchor.fm/non-monogamy-help/episodes/Episode-1-Thruple-Trouble-e1cgbdu This episode does not have a transcript. Please support this podcast and column Even just $1 a month makes a massive difference, so I’d appreciate your help. In exchange for

How to get a partner to tell the truth

I have a question that has been eating up my insides for close to two years now. I have reason to believe my partner is living as non monogamy but has forgotten or is in complete denial, to actually tell me this. What should I Do? I do not and

Polyamory and needs

Before a month ended my last relationship which was with a solo polyamory person. He has been such for many years while for me this was the first such kind of relationship. I grew up in a family which members have various type of relationships — from strictly monogamous to polygamous

Can you be monogamous in polyamory?

I found your blog and I’ve never been so happy to see anything in my whole life. I have a poly[am] boyfriend. For the past 6 months we’ve been monogamous(I was under the impression we were not). My bf decided he wants to have a more

Emotional support and polyamory

I am a 45yr old female (monogamous). Nearly a year ago I met a man who is 43 yrs old and identifies as polyamorous. I had never heard of it and was curious. At first I dismissed it as being an excuse to have several partners (sexual) but after he

Can you control who your partner dates?

I’ve been in a serious relationship with a guy who has recently started to identify as poly[am]. He still has strong feelings for two of his ex girlfriends, but when he and I started dating neither of them was available (and they still aren’t, one is in

Treating “secondaries” poorly

I’m single and have been divorced for five years. (I was in a traditional monogamous marriage for 28 years.) I’ve dated many men in the five years I’ve been divorced and have enjoyed being open about enjoying sex and trying lots of new sexual experiences. In the

When your partner hates your metamour

I am writing to ask for some advice on a non-monogamy situation that has turned ugly. I have a feeling I know what the right thing to do is, but want to make sure I have covered all of my bases. In the past 6 months, I broke up with

How to manage (or not) your metamour

My partner and I have been together for 2.5 years. Our relationship has always been open (we are both poly). I am autistic. He recently started seeing a girl that I have issues with, and may have knocked her up on Sunday. He handled the situation with less tact

If you’ve crossed a boundary

This is a follow up column from ‘When someone’s rules become your own’. Thank you so much for your detailed and thoughtful response — it couldn’t have come at a better time. I say this because the situation has changed somewhat since I wrote to you, though unfortunately it’