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General

I’ve written a few articles in general about non-monogamous relationships which include things I’ve learned and address common pitfalls in most polyamory advice as well as dealing with mental health issues while being polyamorous or trying polyamory.

Thirteen Mistakes People Make When Trying Polyamory

So, you’ve decided to give polyamory or some form of non-monogamy a shot but you’re not quite sure where to start or you might even be wondering if you’re polyamorous or not. Maybe you have read a few things here and there or nothing at all. Or

Don’t you get jealous?

When I tell people that I am not monogamous or I try to explain polyamory, the first question they tend to ask is, “Don’t you get jealous?” For some people, the thought of their partner being interested in, let alone dating someone else creates so much pain for them

Useless Polyam Advice: Jealousy vs. Fear

This is the second post in a series of blogs about the most common advice offered to polyamorous people, specifically newbies, why it’s useless and what you can do instead. “Feel bad? You must be jealous.” I’ve written a bit about this in “Thirteen things I wish I’

Useless Polyam Advice: Self-worth

This is the first post in a series of blogs I plan to do about the most common advice offered to polyamorous people, specifically newbies, why it’s useless and what you can do instead. “Just believe in yourself” The number one thing said to you when you’re scared

Five reasons ‘Couples privilege’ doesn’t exist

This article was written in 2017, so it is possible my perspective has shifted since then however the crux of my argument regarding the use of the term remains. I’ve seen this concept floating around for a long time and I’ve always not really agreed with it or

The hierarchy polyamorous people don’t talk enough about

Hierarchical polyamory is seen as an inherently negative thing within many polyamorous subcultures, but very myopically. There’s a focus on having a primary/secondary structure as always problematic but I actually find that there’s a hierarchy that’s not really spoken about — and that’s the the role

9 strategies for counteracting toxic parenting in non-monogamy

In a previous article, I talked about nine different ways that toxic parenting can impact the communication you have in non-monogamy. For Valentine’s Day, I wanted to spend this article talking about specific strategies to combat these problems both from my own personal experience and the experiences I’ve

9 ways toxic parenting impacted your non-monogamy

When reading the opening preface of a self-help book makes you cry, that’s when you buy the book. And that happened to me twice when I read the forward of both Stop Walking on Eggshells and Toxic Parents. Reading these and several other books were the beginnings of me

Thirteen things I wish I’d learned before choosing non-monogamy

When you first learn about polyamory or non-monogamy, what most people call ‘open relationships’, you’ll likely be directed to several publications: The Ethical Slut, Opening Up, and the website More Than Two. And these were things I read when I started my journey into non-monogamy. Quickly I found though

Non-monogamy and fear

When happening upon polyamory, most people are referred to the same sort of material. The book “Opening Up” is often recommended, “The Ethical Slut” and “Sex at Dawn” are becoming some of the popular things to point people toward. Most people are told that there’s no one right way