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Lola Phoenix

How to define cheating

Here is my situation. I’ve been with my partner for four months, we started our relationship as another one of mine was ending. I definitely jumped in full force to the relationship, partly because of my heartbreak over the previous one. It turned out to work out really well,

An ex wants to make it right

I was at this relationship that ended badly last night. I only had a few flings after deciding that monogamy wasn’t for me, but I studied a lot, and still do. So I met this guy through some friends in common, he was a non monogamist too, and a

Episode 40: Polyam is Valid

What if you’re struggling to see the relationship you have as valid if they’re married to someone else? That’s what’s on this week’s episode of Non-Monogamy Help. Discussion Topic: If a really kind person wanted to praise me, they'd say, if a really

Polyamory to save a marriage

My husband and I married July 2018 and had twin boys September 2018. Before that we were dating for 3 years. I recently learned that he has cheated on me while we dated and also behaved in ways that were not appropriate for a boyfriend. I also learned that he

Episode 39: Multiple Escalators

Is it possible to find a “primary” relationship and build it with an already existing close secondary relationship? That’s what’s on this week’s episode of Non-Monogamy Help. Discussion Topic: If someone likes me a lot, I start to feel… Listen below. You can also find the podcast

Feeling left out and alone

I’m married to a man named Brice and have been for 5 years, together for 11. We have a 2.5 year old child together and we were planning on having more. He’s British and I’m American. I’ve always identified as bisexual and non-monogamous but my

Episode 38: Is Polyamory Part of Me?

Is polyamory a fundamental part of who we are or is it something we can learn? That’s what’s on this week’s episode of Non-Monogamy Help. Discussion Topic: Rank in order of importance for you in your career: money, status, creativity, social impact, colleagues. Listen below. You can

Can you learn compersion?

I really enjoyed reading “Thirteen things I wish I’d learned before choosing non-monogamy.” I’ll start by saying I’ve started exploring my sexuality and what makes me happy just this June. So, I’m still learning. My original intent was not related to non-monogamous relationships at all. It

Episode 37: Don’t Want to Share

When you and your partner are dating the same person and you’re tired of sharing. That’s what’s on this week’s episode of Non-Monogamy Help. Discussion Topic: List 5 things that are important to you in this life. How much time do you give each of them?

Gaslighting and polyamory

My wife and I started a open marriage about 5 years ago. Prior to that we were active in the lifestyle so seeing each other with other people was no longer an issue for either one of us. My wife was the one that suggested the open relationship and I