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Lola Phoenix

Should you do monogamy if you can’t?

I’m in a male in a monogamous hetero relationship. I think I’m poly[am] by predisposition, not by choice, and I explained that her before entering into the mono relationship. I went into the relationship anyways b/c I don’t have much relationship experience, I really love

Can one person meet all your needs?

Am I Poly[am]? I need help with deciding whether I’m poly and whether to tell my wife. OK, so, we’ve been married for 24 years. I love my wife very much. It’s not the same romantic one that we felt before getting married. But we are

Shortchanged by monogamous culture

I read the subject [of your ‘Is Polyamory Worth The Risk’] article with great intensity. You see, I have been married for over forty years and less than two years ago I confronted my wife with the news that I had been, for most of our marriage seeing sex workers

How to manage (or not) your metamour

My partner and I have been together for 2.5 years. Our relationship has always been open (we are both poly). I am autistic. He recently started seeing a girl that I have issues with, and may have knocked her up on Sunday. He handled the situation with less tact

How to start being polyamorous

For the first time in my life, my paradigms about monogamy vs non-monogamy have been broken. They have been eroded because I seem to meet MANY non-monogamous women which have chipped at my wall of monogamy. I also read the book “Sex At Dawn”. I have three questions I would

Polyamory after the birth of a new child

I’ve been in a relationship with my current boyfriend — or I should say husband — for a little over three years now. We got married a year ago just before our now one-year-old daughter was born. (Marriage doesn’t have so much meaning to us. It was more for practical

When reassurance means denial

My wife and I sat down after our one year anniversary, and she advised me that she has always been polyamorous and wanted to experience this part of herself. I am a monogamist, and even though I do not fully understand this, I told her that I was willing to

Is polyamory worth it?

I am 35 years old and have been in a monogamous relationship with a wonderful man since I was 16, with a half-year break in my early twenties during which we both dated other people. Being apart at that time was horrible and made us both see just how good

When your partner blames you for cheating

I have been seeing a man for a little over a year now. He States he wants a non monogamous relationship. He and I have had several; so many; conversations about this. I am open minded and am willing to broaden my world to all new experiences. We had agreed

Getting over your partner sleeping with others

I have a question, am looking for advice on the topic of free/ libertine sexuality and eroticism. Me and my boyfriend of 5 years are in a polyamorous relationship. We both have another long term relationship. I am very much in love with my boyfriend and also love my long